On A Scale Of 1 To 10

This measurement system can certainly work towards many aspects of life currently. In the picture up there getting ready to leave the hospital: that was a super 10 to get the hell out of there. I won't lie as usual, I'm not in the best mood.

On a scale of 1-10, how productive to I feel my visit was? I need to go with a big 10! Not only did we find out exactly how complicated my brain and seizures are, but these "auras" that seemed to be reading on the EEG, are in fact absence seizures. So, I'm not crazy.

On a scale of 1-10, how disappointed am I in my brain? An 11 at least. I was looking forward to having an RNS put in by the end of my visit. It just wasn't meant to be. The DBS is literally my only hope left. If my brain is this complicated, you would think it could apply that to different areas.

On a scale of 1-10, how broken is my heart? Can we go with a solid 20??? Most of this is outside of the hospital. Of course the news was heartbreaking. I haven't cried. Not since I left home to get in that hospital and not since I left the hospital. But mostly, a lack of giving a shit by someone. A specific someone, doesn't.

On a scale of 1-10, how grateful am I for everyone who has given a shit? 100. The ones who have called me, text me, prayed for me, have read these, came to see me, and plan to see me. That would be not him. Oh sorry, that was him and then he found out I made it out alive from the first surgery.

On a scale of 1-10, how much do I appreciate Dr. Constantino, for not giving up on me yet? Infinite.

On a scale of 1-10, how much pain do I have after the surgery? 10! 10! 10! That changes after Oxy or IB Prophen 800. Lots of ice too.

I've been playing Sims 4 since I got to my folks. So since the 17th. I can't go home until the 30th. So that's a lot of time to get to play the game. I might as well be able to try gaining control of someone's lives. It's way more fun than real life.

Like I said....Not in a good mood. Thank you for listening to my rant today.

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I'm More Than Unique

I was waiting for some news to be able to update with. I hope you weren't on the edge of your seat for too long. Let's start with the good. The rods are out of my brain and so is my VNS! YAY!!!!! Yes, it hurts. My head doesn't, just my neck and my chest. I have GREAT muscle tissue where that God forsaken device has sat, useless, for the last three years. Plus, I get to leave tomorrow or Wednesday. I lived!! There's the good news.



Not so good news: based on the information from the invasive EEG, I cannot receive the RNS. Let me tell you why.

I am an epilepsy study dream. My epilepsy is in it's own category, as far as we know. Dr. Constantino does not have and never has had someone like me. I've gone way outside the box! I haven't been able to find another case like mine either. I AM UNIQUE!

Enough bragging.

During my tonic clonic the other day, Dr. Constantino was able to see that both of my frontal lobes are active and it spreads rapidly. Not very unique I know. What makes it unique is that I have small seizures during my tonic clonics. They are just few seconds long. They also act independently from different areas of my frontal lobes. I AM MORE THAN UNIQUE!!! Those mini seizures during my tonic clonics are what ruled me out as a candidate. It's rather interesting and cool, but at the same time it's highly disappointing.

Don't worry though, Dr. Constantino isn't a quitter. She loves a challenge. What she and Dr. House will do is present my unusual case to the Epilepsy Board to request the Deep Brain Stimulation (DBS) Implant to be used to treat my epilepsy. That's not it's use in the U.S. It is currently used for Parkinson's Disease. It is used for epilepsy in the U.K. Hey guys!!! (The Trump baby balloon was FABULOUS!!!) Most sincere apologies for the visit from Hell.

If approved, I would be the first to receive the DBS to treat epilepsy in the U. S. of A that isn't from a clinical study (until I find out otherwise). That is most certainly damn cool.

verywellhealth.com

There's two ways I could leave this hospital. Poppy or Branch? Well, because of the "cool factor" I'm going to just add A LITTLE Poppy to my Branch. We haven't reached the Boyz II Men End of the Road. If my seizures all started at the same, then I'd be EFFED! However, since they all have their own little focal spots, my case gets to be argued. That still gives me a spec of light. 

I just want to know I've exhausted all options. ALL OPTIONS. Like I've said before, I've come this far for a reason, and it's not to say "Oh shoot-darn, better luck next time." WHAT NEXT TIME??? Which is exactly why I will just take this X-MEN mutant info about my brain and wait for a grand birthday present. You guys get to wait with me which makes it even more awesome! So hang tight and Ciao for now!

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